Reflections on being human.
Some one recently commented personally to me on my art , citing that my work translated a sort of anxiousness. It’s funny because this last year this is exactly what I’ve been trying to work on with my self and within my work. I’ve been quite an anxious person the last 7 years or so. And with my work, I always have so many ideas that sometimes it is very difficult to focus. This was more of a problem in the past as it is now, after learning how to cope with brain that seems to operate at the speed of light. This last year I’ve been trying to train myself to take it slow. Learn to relax in life and within my artwork , trying to allow them time to breathe and mature.
For the last 6 years or so my work indeed had an anxiousness to it as I battled my own demons of depression, anxiety and paranoia, and also because I felt I had so much time to make up for from the years I feel I neglected my work as an artist... I suppose neglect is a bad way to describe it, however it is what it is. But as I’ve talked about several times, Time has always been something that gives me great anxiety and fear. Beginning working with oil again this year helped force my hand in patience and playing the waiting game. Now with a new technique with sculpting in plaster this is also helping e fine tune my work and at the same time teaching me lessons in patience. As a human, in the last three years I’ve learned priceless lessons in humility, spirituality and how fragile my pursuit of having a calm mind and soul can be. The last year is shaping out to show me I have developed more as an artist and to me, personally, I am the happiest I have ever been in life and with my own work. I hope within my newest works what can be seen is more of this now, rather than anxiety... more peace.